I live in one of the nine Counties that make up Metropolitan Atlanta.  Like any large city we have our concerns over air pollution.  In the infinite wisdom of the County I live in they have declared that you cannot burn your “yard debris” between May 1 and September 30 of any year.  Well that sounds reasonable, because I know personally during those months I am prone to being a raving lunatic arsonist so it is a good thing the County keeps me in check.  During those months I would have a huge fire, likely to spread to my neighbors and just burn down the whole street.  So I am restricted to October 1 through April 30 to burn my leaves and dead branches (I have a lot).  Well that would seem logical, but lets toss in another County rules, you can’t burn on Sunday any time of the year.  Well I guess the firefighters have to go to church so we wouldn’t want them storming out on a sermon just to put out fires set by unreliable homeowners.

Well no fear, I still have Monday to Saturday when the bureaucrats will allow me to have a fire.  Well, not quite so simple, you see the County has exploited technology and has a website.  On that website at 6:30 AM every Monday to Saturday from October 1 through to April 30 they let us mere citizens know if it is a “burn day” in the County.  I think the firefighters union runs this website.  From January through early April of this year there were probably only 10 burn days allowed.  The rationale varied daily from “there is a cold front moving in” to “winds of up to 15 mph are predicted” and my personal favorite, “chance of rain, no burning allowed”.  I have diligently checked the web site every morning to see if I am capable of having a fire.  The bureaucrats truly thing the masses are incapable of controlling themselves.  Just this past Saturday I managed to burn some of the yard trimmings and leaves left over from last fall.  The pile has sat there in my back yard, taunting me, but it’s nearly gone I just need one more burn day in the remaining few days of the month.

I am so glad the Vatican is not in my County in Georgia, they would never have elected a Pope as quick as they did, having to wait for the government to tell them when they could have a fire.